I Let My Son Have Screen Time As a Baby. It Was a Necessity.

It’s a cloudy afternoon and my 2-year-old is watching “The Lego Movie,” while my husband works his 9-to-5 job.

I am in charge of our kid, the primary caregiver or stay-at-home-mom, if you will. But I have things to do too, and I can’t afford a nanny. So for the next two hours, a movie will act as my babysitter. My kid is still and calm, safe on the couch while I type right next to him, checking things off my own to-do list.

I’ll be the first to admit it’s not a perfect set-up, but it’s a necessary one.

Screens were a necessity

My child probably first laid eyes on a screen when he was 3 months old, and it’s not something I regret. Many experts recommend that children not be exposed to screens until they are older than that. However, the only people I know among my mom friends who subscribe to this philosophy religiously are parents who can afford nannies, daily activities, or daycare.

For some parents who stay at home, especially with younger children, they are likely doing so due to the cost of childcare outweighing the paycheck they’d be making at a job. So when are those parents, parents like me, supposed to get a break?

There are benefits to screen time

I believe that educational content can be very enriching for children, so I allow my son to watch “Ms. Rachel,” along with old ’90s PBS shows like “Barney,” which he watches on YouTube. These shows not only teach him skills that will prepare him for kindergarten but also teach empathy, kindness, and friendship. My son almost never throws tantrums, and I think a big part of that is the self-regulation he’s learned from watching TV.

For movies, he enjoys Disney movies and musicals.

With the right curation from me, I see TV and film as a useful supplement for my child’s growing brain. I also appreciate how it exposes him to culture. Films were a big part of my childhood memories, and I wouldn’t want to deny my child the opportunity to grow up with old musicals and Disney movies, just like I did.

Not all screens are equal in my mind

I say all of this about screens with a big caveat: I don’t think babies, toddlers, or even young children should have access to iPads. I have one that I use for work, but I’ve purposely kept it out of my toddler’s hands. I don’t think being so close to a screen and having unfiltered access to whatever the internet has to offer is good for a growing mind.

I also closely monitor the content my child watches and will continue to do so as he grows. We avoid offerings that I find overstimulating.

Screens are only part of our day

Our son is not sitting in front of the TV all day. It’s usually an hour or so, here and there.

We also take trips to the the park and local museums multiple times a week. I read to him every day, and we spend a lot of time at our library. Ours has many programs that encourage kids to read, and we have followed them religiously since he was big enough to visit, such as the summer reading program. This program awards prizes for every hour a child reads, and we complete it every year.

In a perfect world, parents would have endless energy to entertain their children, and kids could be left to their own devices without fear of them getting themselves into trouble. But that’s just not feasible for most stay-at-home parents. I know it’s OK to take a break from time to time and put on a beloved movie for my kid to relax to. He’s a person, too, and he deserves a break from the chaos as much as I do.